in the end he told you that
he didn’t want you
but he never did you the
courtesy of leaving
out of necessity, you
reconstructed your identity around being alone
though you almost never
thought of it in those terms
you spent time allowing all
the wrong people to think you are beautiful
watching them blindly perform
unreciprocated feelings onto you
at a distance twice removed
from the act
because you refuse to know
the feeling of not loving anything
though the feeling will force
itself into you sometimes
everyone will tell you what
the most painful part is
they will say it’s the moment
nothing is left for you in him
or it’s the moment he finds
you in someone else
but nobody will tell you that
it is possible
to move further from reality
every day
until there are no parts of
you in anything